My Way

I've had a 'plethora' of requests this week to update my blog.. let everyone know whats going on as the big day draws ever closer... I fully intended to be on this thing almost daily ,giving you something random to feast on.. guess what, my social life just took off! Always the case huh! So here it is... something at least... enjoy.

Everyday I bump into someone who just found out my news... so far the reaction has been fairly consistent. An electric mix of excitement and envy, quickly followed by that dreaded question...

What are you going to do? 

I never imagined that this would become the all consuming question that would give me so many sleepless nights. What are you going to do? Well the simple answer is nothing. Yet. The possibilities and in turn the responsibility that has suddenly been bestowed on me is far bigger and heavier and more awkward than I expected. In the beginning I was like a creature longing for attention. Looking for the reassurance that all would be well from everyone. Following the ideas and directions of all those around me. Australia YEAH! South America YEAH! Timbuktoo YEAH!.. well not anymore.

Its impossible to imagine how overwhelming it is when suddenly you have the opportunity to do ANYTHING you want to do... anything at all, anywhere in the world. The pressure of making that year count, something worthwhile, something relaxing, some adventure. Develop yourself, clear your head, find your vocation.

Yeah, its that crazy -  its supposed to be relaxing and all of a sudden you have this huge responsibility on your shoulders.. and you are representing all of those friends who are living their dreams through your eyes.

So in order to enjoy my last days in Amsterdam, without going completely crazy, I am not making any decisions. I am moving back to England, I am taking a vacation with some important people in my life, and only then will I begin to forge a direction, a plan.

So please, send your ideas on a postcard, and don't be upset if I don't visit that small town in Argentina you loved so much when you were 23.

I need to do this my way! 

L